Tik Tok Thots: Thot Pursuit
Dating tips for assholes, cartoon redheads, and Tik Tok Thots
Welcome to the latest issue of Tough Scene: A Lifestyle Newsletter For Degenerates.
This week, we’ve got:
-Dating tips for assholes
-Hottest cartoon redheads
-Tik Tok Thots
Let’s get to it. Don’t forget to subscribe and share with your loser friends.
Dating Tip For Assholes
Track Your Data
If you’re dating multiple women, it can be challenging keeping track of everything. You don’t want to repeat stories or get caught in a lie, and you definitely don’t want to start taking different girls to the same restaurant. Tracking data helps avoid these issues and ensures your spending is proportional to what you’re getting in return.
You’re probably lucky to get even one response to your flaccid dick pic, but this is a good practice in case more than one woman shows poor judgement at once.
Hot Take Of The Week
If you’re spending more than $400 at the strip club, just get an escort.
A trip to the titty bar is costing you minimum $100 just for cover charge and drinks, and that’s before even factoring in dances, massages, and shenanigans.
If you’re dropping serious cash just to get teased, you’re better off getting a hotel room/Airbnb and hiring an escort from Eros.
For the same price, you’ll get actual satisfaction instead of a four minute dick tease from a local single mom hairstylist/make up artist with a dead look in her eyes.
Tik Tok Thots
Bounce bounce bounce with @rose.hartt
Hottest Cartoon Redheads
5. Dexter’s Mom (Dexter’s Laboratory)
She’s a notorious germaphobe, but will cook you omelet du fromage. Dexter and Dee Dee’s mother never got an actual name on the show, but any woman with a big enough ass to balance silverware is a 10 in our book.
4. Ms. Frizzle (Magic School Bus)
Intelligence is sexy. Professor Valerie Felicity Frizzle, Ph.D. will take you on a ride through the human circulatory system and teach you all kinds of cool shit. Her catch phrase is “It's time to take chances, make mistakes and get messy!” so you know she’s a freak.
3. Lois Griffin (Family Guy)
An absolutely smokeshow. In one episode, she says "Women are such teases. that's why I went back to men.", and in another they hint about a years long affair with KISS’ Gene Simmons. Top tier.
2. Elastigirl (The Incredibles)
The animators had no reason to give Helen Parr that absolute dump truck other than being complete horny degenerates. That cute midwestern accent is a nice touch too.
1. Jessica Rabbit (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?)
Singlehandedly put a bunch of elementary school boys through puberty in the early 90’s. When asked why Jessica Rabbit, a baritone cabaret singer, is married to dopey Roger Rabbit, she says “He makes me laugh”, giving hope to losers like you.
Serving Cunt
The phrase “serving cunt” has been making its way around the Twitterverse.
This absolutely horrendous way of saying “looking hot” exploded in popularity for some reason. Of all the ways to describe a woman looks attractive, “serving cunt” is probably the worst.
Well, maybe it’s not all bad.
Pussy From A Girl
Could you even imagine?
